Can You Feel It Now?

I have nothing against cell phones. I have one.

I do have something against inconsiderate, selfish cell phone users.

Every where I go I hear people on their cell phones chatting rather loudly about this and that and who's doing what with whom and other details of their boring little lives. And while they're chatting they're not paying attention to what's happening around them, and that pisses me off.

I was at a drive-thru window recently and kept waiting for the car in front of me to place his food order. I assumed he was placing a larger order so I waiting patiently. And I waited and waited some more. Finally he pulled forward and passed the pick-up window without stopping. When I got to the pick-up window I asked what happened and was told the man was on his cell phone and refused to interrupt his conversation to place his order. Then when he finished his call he realized he wasn't hungry after all.

How many times have you almost been hit by a car because the driver was too busy on their cell phone and not watching where they're going? I don't know about you, but I certainly don't want to get a one way ticket to the white light that ends at the Pearly Gates because of someone on a cell phone. Death by cell phone is not my death of choice. My death of choice is old age.

So whom are all these people calling? And why do people have to be on the phone all the time?

I don't even want to start about all those silly ring tones? But take this as a warning: If I hear someone's phone spewing the theme from "Sex and the City" one more time I'm gonna grab it and smash it on the pavement.

Ooh… my phone's in my pocket and it just vibrated. Ooh… it kinda tickles.

I think I just found a new purpose for cell phones.

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